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Ultimate Fantasy 63 Homosexual In-laws

Let me begin by telling you my ultimate fantasy. Jealous? Oh shit! It is possible. Who do you love? Do you have friends that you go out with all the time? That’s okay. That’s not my fantasy. I never had a real fantasy about going out with anyone. Maybe you do. Or maybe you don’t.

I am not a typical gay boy. I am not a typical gay man. Not according to popular fashions. Or popular wisdom. Not according to what the research says. Or popular courtship tactics. I am not a typical gay man. Or popular ways to fuck.

Maybe you are. Or maybe you aren’t. But whatever you are, don’t call me Christopher Reeve or John Wayne. I am NOT like that! I am NOT! I am NOT a gay boy!

Okay. So, what are you? I am NOT an effeminate effeminate.

That’s what you are! You could be!

Well, wouldn’t be the first to say so! Don’t you think there should be some kind of… Sodomy laws. Oh! Sodomy laws! Like the one in New York. The one in New York! And what about those in California, Washington, DC, Massachusetts, Wyoming, and even Canada?

What are you talking about? Oh! You mean like inani-fuckers! Homosexual in-laws! I didn’t use the expression “sodomy laws.” I use the expression, “homosexual in-laws.” “In-laws.” Homosexual in-laws. Oh! You have one. Two. Three.

I may have had one, but I don’t anymore. In fact, I don’t think I have ever had a lover. Most of my closest relationships have been platonic, long-term affairs. They never climaxed and usually wound up hurting the person in some way. Not me. I like love. I have a great, abiding, if occasionally paranoid fondness for cats and grasshoppers. I married a nice woman once, although her tastes in men were… questionable. I have never had a lover.

Have you ever had sex with someone you loved? I don’t think I’ve ever had sex with anyone. With anyone? Well, no. And I’m sure you never will.

I never would have dreamed of proposing to you if I had known you were gay. Why not? Well, there’s the matter of custody. What’s that?

The matter of custody. I mean, if I do live with you, do you want me to report you to the authorities as though you were the one who was being homosexual?

That would amount to child molestation.

Well, that’s an interesting point. Because the law doesn’t care if you’re gay or not.

The law does care. In California, if you’re found with “gay pornography” you can be imprisoned for up to two years and fined up to a maximum of $25,000.

On second thought, I don’t think that’s a fair punishment. I mean, even if you’re found to be having homosexual fantasies, it’s still wrong to punish a child for that.

The judge didn’t seem to take into account that even if the fantasies were about sex acts with other boys, that’s still wrong. So, I suppose it’s up to the parents to decide what’s wrong with their child.

The judge also seemed to think that since it was a consensual relationship, it didn’t matter if it was being done by a boy or a girl. And that even if the two of you had had homosexual fantasies, that didn’t change the fact that you were a child.

So, I suppose it’s up to the judge to make a call on whether your son should be punished for what he is.

Listen, I think you should try to understand my position better. You are my mother. Period. And I will protect you. You are putting my life in danger. I will not testify against my son, and I will fight to the death to keep my son in this school.

Don’t try to equate this to consensual homosexual acts with what it is in the Bible.

You want to turn this school around, Mr. Reiss? I will fight to the death to keep it that way. This isn’t the First Amendment we’re talking about here.

It is what it is. A public school. A place where boys can learn. A place where I, a woman, could be a lesbian. That’s what the law is. Shit! Now that’s got me. You may call the school tomorrow and we can all meet with the principal and hopefully get something worked out. But, my mother and I will not testify against our son. And we will fight to the death to keep our son in this school.

The battle’s just begun!


Do you like to have anonymous sex in public rest rooms? Sex movies? Public parks? Sex clubs? On street corners with heavy hustling traffic? How many nonsexual friendships or acquaintances lasting for decades started this way? How many ways are there to love queers? How many ways are there to queer love?

Let me begin by telling you my ultimate fantasy. . .



Prompt adapted from A Queer History of Computing

· school, queer, GPT-2, RunwayML